2023 was full of change
In 2022, my life was getting back to normal. Or at least as normal as it could be in a post-pandemic world. This was why I had planned for 2023 to be the year of change. I also inwardly told myself that this was probably the last year that my time and energy was going to be spent on me. Now that I’m married, I want to achieve my next milestone, which is starting a family. And that requires a lot of my time, and energy. So this year I really wanted to focus on me and setting the foundation for my family.
As usual, I’m going to recommend that you check out my previous reflections. It’s not mandatory, but I’m the kind of person who likes to see the growth of others, so maybe you want to read about mine? Here’s 2018, 2019, and 2022 (2020 and 2021 didn’t happen, okay?)
Let’s start reflecting on 2023
WHAT I WANTED IN 2023, AS REFLECTED BY MY VISION BOARD
To improve my health by taking walks, improving my “at home” cooking abilities, and learning how to better control my mind and emotions. So basically, my physical and my mental health.
To discover North Carolina by going on day trips, and “living like a local” so I could better understand and learn about my new home.
To have better style by wearing clothes that I could only pin on Pinterest or admire on other people. I love the idea of being able to express myself with fashion. To have a ‘signature look’ that is me.
To fill my home with nature because even though I was (and kinda am) a city girl. I love the idea of surrounding myself with nature and pretty plants.
To have my own home or a place to call “home”.
To “outsmart” rough mornings so I could get better at waking up in the morning and not feel so tired throughout the day.
To find an identity for my hair because after my wedding/1st anniversary in 2022, I wanted to rediscover what my hair-identity is. What should my hair look like and be like?
To improve my skincare, I’ve dabbled with skincare, and I want to continue figuring out how to best take care of the largest organ of my body.
To learn how to ask for help. I’m used to doing things on my own and relying on myself. It’s one of the lessons my grandmother taught me. However, I do know that there are people in my life who would be willing to help if only they knew I needed it.
To minimize waste and maximize time.
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED IN 2023
I moved! This was one of the things I wanted in 2022, and I finally did it!
I made friends with my neighbors, one of them became a prominent figure in my life in 2023. She is also a transplant but from Connecticut. We’ve gone out for food and drinks. I stopped by a TON at her place to hang out when I felt lonely. And I also befriended a couple of neighbors with dogs in the area.
I explored the city of Durham by using a magazine that I found in my apartment complex about the ‘best spots to check out’ in Durham and scheduling dates/times on my calendar to check them out. Some of my favorites include The Scrap Exchange, Part and Parcel, Boxcar Bar + Arcade, and 321 Coffee,
I had brunch dates with my hubby on Saturday mornings. I focused primarily on breakfast spots and diners with him. My favorite brunch spot is First Watch ‘cause their Purple Haze is ah-ma-zing.
I started a ‘reconnecting campaign’ with my LinkedIn Connections since I realized after moving how isolated my husband and I were. So I started to reach out and ‘connect’ with all my connections. After all, a good chunk of them were people who I either really wasn’t connected with in a meaningful way or I haven’t heard since the pandemic.
I avoided snow in Jersey in January, which felt amazing.
Produced the Start Grow Manage Podcast, we used to have a third-party company producing our company’s podcast, but I took this over in 2023. You can check it out here, YouTube, or wherever you like listening to podcasts.
Attended various game nights in Durham, one of them being at Boxyard RTP, and it was there I met a bunch of great people. One of them is a wizard at word games. I also discovered many breweries in Durham have board game nights, which I checked out.
I joined the Jersey Girls of North Carolina, which was by far the most impactful group of people I met in North Carolina. These ladies did help me feel like a local; chatting with them online (and seeing them offline) was great.
I traveled A TON back and forth between North Carolina and New Jersey. Sometimes it was by car, other times by plane. Lots of interesting Lyft rides. Lots of Spotify playlists and audiobooks were listened to for these trips.
At Start Grow Manage, we officially launched Business Implementors. This was something we offered our clients to help them save hours of their week with admin work, and there was enough demand to make this its own business.
We had three successful SGM Summits in April, August, and December with our clients at Start Grow Manage. It was great seeing our clients in person, and I even got a cute pin that says, “I love to help” from one of our clients. (And if you ever want to join our community, you can!)
My husband and I started playing IRL Pokemon, and not Pokemon Go (well, yes, Pokemon Go as well), but more like we started to collect critters in our new home. My husband brought home a praying mantis and hamster in March. I caught a little green anole in April, a couple of critters, including a toad, and then we added a cat and dog in the summer. We also caught (and released) baby birds that hatched on my neighbor’s patio.
I started to use Descript for my video editing needs. I think it’s a great platform to edit videos quickly and effectively. I also joined a few of their CrowdCast events and Discord for additional support.
My hubby and I hosted some friends and family who stopped by to visit throughout the year. Granted, these guests were more family than friends, but it was still neat being on the ‘hosting’ side of things.
I read a few book series for pleasure, the entire Wicked Villains series by Katee Robert, “The Kiss Thief” by L.J. Shen, and The Fairy Tales Reimagined series by Laura Burton
I took care of my hair at Poppy’s salon. They took care of both my hair and my husband’s hair. They also carry RedKen hair products, which I was looking into, so it felt validating that they recommended the product I would get anyway.
I played Pokemon Go and Pokemon Sleep, which has been great for my health! Pokemon Go and their route feature constantly gave me an excuse to get out and go on walks, while Pokemon Sleep has encouraged me (and my husband) to have better sleeping habits.
I celebrated St. Carlos Day with my sisters, nephews, and niece. It’s one of those yearly traditions that I hold dear to my heart, especially after my dad passed away, and I’m so happy that my family is up for keeping the tradition of celebrating it alive.
I celebrated Thanksgiving in North Carolina with my husband and neighbor. She hosted us. My husband and I also took our dog on a playdate, which was very cool.
I rejoined Neopets, since they are under new management. It’s been a nostalgia trip, and it is enjoyable being in the front-row seats of the crazy “pea-gate” scandal and watching as the new owners tackle inflation with the Advent Calendar. I also joined a guild on Neopets which has helped me creatively.
UNEXPECTED EVENTS IN 2023:
My grandma started to fall… a lot. After we moved down, she fell a couple of times. None of these falls were fatal, but they were stressful, and I was grateful that my best friend was able to step in and help me since I was much too far away to call an ambulance or be much help.
I got a ton of support from my “Titi”, my second cousin, but in my eyes, she’s more like an aunt figure in my life. As my grandma’s health took a nose-dive in the summer, Titi stepped up and was able to visit my grandma while I flew in and out of Jersey in July and August.
I got a one-way ticket to Jersey in September as Titi could no longer help, and then I took over as primary caregiver for my grandma. This was quite the experience as I was in a whirlwind of doctor’s appointments and even property manager duties for my grandma.
I did PT with my grandma to help her recover. Due to her not speaking Spanish and just not following directions, I attended most of her sessions. It also was nice to get a bit of a workout myself.
I had to be a property manager and ask my mother-in-law to help me fix up one of my grandma’s apartments. This included a TON of Home Depot trips and asking for help to find things.
I went to my friend’s Halloween party, that she hosted in HER STORE. I’m so proud of her and if you are an anime fan (or are in the Bayonne area in NJ) you should stop by.
I learned what a lien was and definitely handled that.
I went to TWO school reunions! One of them was my college reunion, though admittedly, only 3 people from my actual college were there. Sadly, since my college shut down and was basically acquired by another university, there were more people from the latter. My other reunion also only had 3 other attendees, which were my middle school classmates and me seeing each other after soooooo many years. It would have been nice if more of them showed up (we were a graduating class of 16), but I appreciated it anyway.
I went to a Friendsgiving. Someone who I admire invited me to her Friendsgiving fiesta, and I was so honored to be there. I also was able to reconnect with a few college friends and make a couple of new ones.
WHAT I DID NOT DO IN 2023:
Go house-hunting, and I wish I was able to. My plan was to start hunting down a place in August, but with all the trips back and forth to Jersey, I couldn’t make house-hunting a priority.
Find an identify for my hair. I was able to get it looked at, but I still think I’m going through a “hair identity” crisis. However, I think I’m starting to be okay with going au natural for now. It’s cheaper and low-maintenance, and I kind of need that in my life right now.
Go as minimalist as I hoped, for my apartment is still cluttered with things and I’m sure I could have done a better job at decluttering and reorganizing my apartment.
I didn’t use Notion as much this year. Sure, there were moments I used it, like to plan for my move, to help me organize my tasks, to help me brainstorm for my grandma, and to use it as a cloud-storage solution. But after March, my daily logs on Notion were almost non-existent.
Fully develop my style. Though I had to admit, I bought a few pieces that make my wardrobe more ‘me’. I bought two things from PopFlex, and I get so many compliments in them, and they are comfortable. I also started wearing some slip-on sneakers, which is NOT my style, but it is easy to wear and walk in at the moment.
Post on this blog. Which you maybe noticed or maybe didn’t notice. Either way, it didn’t happen. I am only writing this because I want to continue the tradition. The funny thing is that I have a lot of stuff pre-written to publish… I just haven’t gone around editing and publishing them.
FINAL NOTES ABOUT 2023:
Honestly… I felt like a failure this year. I think it’s because it's been a difficult road ever since August/September of 2023. I’ve been stressing out so much over my grandmother, her property, my job, my relationships, etc., that I’ve felt like I’ve been running on a treadmill and getting nothing done.
But looking at my vision board and looking at all the things I wrote… I think I actually got a lot more done than I give myself credit for.
Like even the part of “say yes to help” came true this year as people in my life have stepped forward to help me through this difficult time. I know this is ‘woo woo’ to type, but it is like putting what you want from your brain onto a physical thing, putting it out into the universe… Kinda helps.
So here’s to a (hopefully) calmer 2024. Admittedly, I think I’ll still be in the season of change and chaos since I still need to build my foundation in my new home.
Feel free to share how your year went or what your goals/plans are for 2024.